Talkin’ Dirty (G-rated)

Romance?  Passion?  Fantasies?  No. 

FARMING?  YES!!!!

Dirty?  Absolutely!

The past 2 years I’ve been whining about how wet it was for harvest.  This year was as close to perfect as it’s gonna get and this year we actually saw “dust”!!! 

Apparently, someone else noticed a tiny bit of whining.  How do I know?  She gave me a bottle of this for my birthday-----

What’s so great about a bottle of wine?  Read the label a little closer:

 What’s your point?????

So here’s what I spent about 100 hours looking at:

 

Sugarbeets in the front

 

 

 

 

Sugar-beets in the back

 

 

 

 

Sugarbeets under my wheels:

 

 

 

Here are some action shots of me steering the tractor:

 

 

Look Ma, no hands!!!

 

 

 

Oh gosh!  I need to move an inch to the left! 

 

 

Honestly.  My tractor was equipped with a satellite system called Auto Steer.  When the field is planted, Mr. Farmer enters the latitude & longitude &  his height & weight and what he had for dinner.  Or something.  Wa-la, straight rows.  So when I start the harvest rolling, all I need are the coordinate numbers, pull into the row, push a couple buttons and we’re off.  On a mile-long field, I can really read a lot of pages in my favorite novel.  It beeps once at the end of the row so I know to put down the book and make the turn.  The stress is HORRIBLE!!! 

Sugarbeets are planted in rows 22” apart.  The tires are about 20”.  The GPS is accurate to about 3”.  So you see, SOMETIMES, the wheels would be a tish off and the picture above shows me pushing the button to move the tractor over 1”.  Again, STRESS!  It’s a wonder I survived.

This is what’s called a buddy seat for when you need to bring  your child along?  It’s also where our dog Baxter sometimes sat. 

Unfortunately he also sometimes wanted to sit on my lap.  I had to banish him from my tractor because he kept hitting the controls.

I sat in this Captain Kirk type ergonomic, swivel chair that had many of the controls right on the arm rest. 

Here is a picture of hubby loading one of the trucks.

 

And here is hubby and Baxter – taking a nap?  what the heck?  No, I’m sure they were working.  Don’t you think?

After reading all that, don’t you feel dirty? 

 

Prairie Women’s Sewing Circle – This monthly club is one that I lead for Karen at Farmhouse Woolens and Dry Goods.  I would like to say that I teach it but there’s very little teaching going on but there sure is a lot of laughter.

Here’s a picture of me with part of the group.  I’m standing toward the right side in white not teaching:

I have cleverly put them all to work with needle & thread which cuts down on the amount of grief they can throw my way.  To tell you the truth, I can’t imagine a better and more fun group of women.  How lucky I am!!

We’ve just had our 2nd club meeting with 4 more to go.  Mostly we’ll do miniatures and this is the 1st month project that they all brought back finished.  They all turned out different and that makes it so fun….. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

Isn’t that Ms. Neecie showing us how to turn a miniature into a super-miniature? 

Now this is a gal who is always marching to the beat of a different drummer.  And I’m so glad because it’s absolutely wonderful Neecie!  You inspire us to challenge ourselves…….

What were some of your favorite Halloween costumes from your youth (5 years ago)?  Or from your kids?  I remember one year when my daughter was about 9 or 10 and our son was about 2 or 3.  I turned them into Raggedy Ann and Andy.  OMG, they were so cute!  I think Ann’s hair was a mop head dyed red.  Apparently it was hot & hard to keep on her head.  She had a high-waisted skirt & blouse, big red circles on her cheeks and freckles on her nose.  Little “Andy” had pants and suspenders and I don’t remember the rest of his costume.  One year our 2 boys were the Lone Ranger & Tonto.  This involved them each wearing boxes with horse-like spots on them and reins toward the horse’s head.  Cowboy boots & hats and I think that also involved 6-shooters….Oh, yeah, remember being a pair of dice?   Well there are a lot of really cute costumes that you can buy now – not the plastic masks of my youth – but I still like the ones we made at home the very best.  I got to thinking about costumes because Raggedy Andy aka the Lone Ranger aka one dice aka out oldest son and his lovely wife stopped here just now on their way to a Halloween party.  I totally CANNOT believe he was convinced to dress in costume but here they are as Paul Bunyon and Babe (the blue ox):

  If Fleet Farm doesn’t have it, you don’t need it – right RJ?  Even the cowbell around  “Babe’s” neck came from Fleet Farm.  Too bad all you town ladies don’t have access to Fleet Farm.  It’s the Niemen Marcus for farm folk!!  LOL

And check out what “Babe” (the blue ox) brought me:

Happy Fall y’all -

Leave of Absence

Where have I been?  Mostly just here “down on the farm” but definitely NOT in my happy place.  As farmers, the last thing we want is rain in October.  Murphy’s Law (in which anything that can go wrong, will) would require us then to have almost 6” for the month.  And the next 2 days look rainy.  Color us unhappy.  Are you feeling my pain sisters?  Here’s a little lookee-loo: 

  I know this is out of focus but I was a long way away and I blew this up so you could see the truck badly stuck in the mud.  It doesn’t even look bad from this distance, but I would have wanted my TALL BOOTS to get up close & personal to that one.  I worry about the men when the conditions are bad but I worry even more when they put 2 tractors on a truck.  There’s just too much horsepower & opportunity for an accident.  We had none, thank the Lord.  The truck however, stayed in the mud that day. 

These 2 trucks were moving under their own power.  But it didn’t last very long:

This was a full time job.  Always one tractor but often 2 like this to pull trucks from the moment they enter the field until they leave it:

Those guys WILL NOT be getting stuck.  But he’s my contact with anyone in the field as I’m not excited about driving out there and sometimes someone needs lunch sent  out.  (I’m not naming names Mr. Picket Fence, I’m just sayin…….)  He’s so far off the ground that he has to come part way down so I can hand something up.  Sheesh.  Those are some major mud pies on those steps too. 

And can you imagine how long it takes us (us? what, do you think I help?  Do you see the word “stupid” on my forehead?) to wash up the equipment before it gets stored for the winter? 

There now, don’t you just wish you were a farmer?  Are you bored yet?  Well, I am so lets move along.  And I promise, no more farm tales – even if you beg.  Ya, uh-huh.  Just like I’d beg for a root canal.

Moving on.  I’ve always enjoyed Fertilizer Fridays and especially love when Tootsie gives us little lessons about all things gardening.  I enjoy gardening as much as the next guy – and quite often more – but I’m stumped on what is wrong here.  The nasturtiums are drooping.  The black-eyed Susan's look terrible.   Am I using the wrong fertilizer?  Too much water?  Too little water?  Wrong light conditions?  Help me out here Tootsie!

Wait.

Wait.

Wait a little more.

OK, here – these two definitely look funky:

 

A prize to the 1st one who answers correctly.  Perhaps a bucket of snow????  Or maybe a dead leaf?  It’ll be to-die-for.  Get it?  die-for?  dead leaves?  Well, if I’ve got to explain everything, what’s the point, I ask you?  Anyway, the prize is nothing you’d want so I guess I won’t send it.  (got out of that, didn’t I?)

Now this dogwood and monkshood don’t look too bad for being snowed on:

I’ve been raking leaves and shredding them to use as mulch both now (when everything freezes) and also in the spring as a soil additive.  The container plants have all been cleaned out and pots put away.  Garden decorations have been put away.  If it ever dries up I may mow one more time to chop up any remaining leaves.  Or not.  We’ll see.  I’m not going to drive thru water to mow.  You with me?   I’ve put all my tools in one spot so I can clean, sharpen & oil them for the winter.  (talk is cheap)  A gardener’s work is never done! 

Loose threads didn’t meet this month because of harvest.  We’re all farm women in that group and we all get October-depression.  It’s always cured by wrapping up harvest.  Unresolved issues this year!  Maybe there’s a Dr. Phil show in our group.  Oh, I can hear you now.  You’re saying, “you mean he hasn’t already done a show on you wacko’s?”  Or you might say, “go rob a drug train and take a pill”.  Or, I know.  Get together with the Woolies!  So I did.  Thank God--other females to talk to. About non-mud topics.  Woo-hoo.

I was so excited about going to Woolies,  I forgot my camera – can you believe it?  So I’ll need to beg, borrow or steal pictures from Karen.  When I get pictures, I will post them.  We had lots & lots of eye candy this month too.  Karen is off to Des Moines, Iowa to vend at an AQS show this week along with her friend Kari at New Leaf Stitches.    Those 2 will make friends where-ever, so I’m not worried about them being bored!  Hope it’s a great show girls!

Since I wrote this yesterday, we’ve added another inch of rain and now it’s snowing.  October just isn’t as much fun as it used to be if you hear what I’m sayin’.

I’ve gotten really behind with reading & writing blogs this month.  I want to say thanks to all you dedicated people who stop by and leave a comment.  I truly appreciate you!  :)

What are you dressing up as for Halloween?

 

 

Mud Pies and why I hate them….

I’ve been debating if I should write about harvest because why would anyone be interested?  But like I’ve said before, it’s my blog and if it makes me feel better, why not? 

Farming is so different from other occupations.  We don’t “do” farming like someone might “do” mechanical work.  We “live” farming.  It’s always here staring us in the face.  You can do all the things right with the seed choices, the fertilizers and chemicals needed, the cultivation and a hundred other things and in the end we still are at the mercy of Mother Nature.  Harvest is the time that a year’s worth of work is realized.  Payday if you will.

Here in the Valley, we grow a very large  percentage of the beet sugar grown in the U.S.  It’s a very big deal in terms of our area economy as well as for individuals.  If you ever buy Crystal Sugar, it might have come from our farm.

Once beet harvest starts in October it continues 24 hours a day until done.  EXCEPT, when we get temps below freezing or when the ground temp is above 50-some degrees.  Then we have to wait until those conditions change.  OR, when we’ve had too much rain for the equipment to move.  In the past week, we’ve had over 3” of rain. 

We are working today – I helped move equipment to a field that “might” have less mud.  But let me show a few pics taken before the last 1” of rain….

Approach to the field: 

Water stands in various parts of the fields:

  

 

On the left is the tractor that lifts the beets from the ground putting them into the truck which is pulled by a large 4-wheel drive tractor.  The truck would be stuck in minutes without the tractor towing:

 

 

Being pulled out of the field……

Onto the road……..

We’re on the road and being un-hooked from the tractor.

 

The county does it’s best to clean the roads for everyone’s safety:

And our almost- perfect Baxter.  You cannot imagine how he struggles with harvest.  He very badly wants to be with Mr.... Farmer.  But look at all that mud.  Do you think Mrs.... Picket Fence will be upset if I run thru all that?????????  (yes, I WAS!!)  Maybe he’ll be perfect tomorrow.

I am so over all that farming in the  mud story, aren’t you?  I have a couple things I’m working on but I can only show you one today.  I was out in my woodshop and look what I found:

It’s a primitive candle box that I made as a surface on which to mount this punch needle embroidery project. 

What I will show you in a day or 2 is the Wool Garden sample that I made for Mrs.... Farmhouse over at Farmhouse Woolens.  I’ll post the finished picture plus a tutorial on how to finish it.

I’d best go check on the farm progress.  It’s been quiet so that should mean it’s moving along. 

Green Acres is the place to be…..

Just like in the military, there is a whole lot of hurry up & wait here on the farm during harvest.  Oh, and I have good news and bad news.  The good news is that we FINALLY started wheat harvest and the bad news is that the wet wheat I couldn’t even give away is now dry and you’d have to pay dearly to get your hands on it.  You snooze, you lose!  We’re bringing wheat in about 6 weeks late.  That’s a record and one we don’t care to repeat thank you very much. 

What’s my job you wonder?  I am the head go-fer, the ride giver, truck mover, food person and any other stupid job they can think up.  Oh, I’m kidding.  There’s nothing hard that I do but it’s important that I’m here.  As in not out having fun.  But there are many perks that go along with my job.  All the wheat dust I care to breathe, the opportunity to travel (back & forth from the field) and best of all is my salary.  My employer (Mr. Picket Fence) is so generous – he doubles my salary every year!  (zero X zero = double zero!!!  WaHoo!)  Wait, there’s more.  I get to drive the really old farm pickup.  It does have 4 wheels but the radio doesn’t work, there is no air conditioning except for the model 2/55.  That’s the kind where you have 2 open windows and go 55 MPH.   Power windows were invented about 100 years after this pickup was built.  Truly, I don’t mind rolling up/down the windows.  But  picture me in the pickup alone with the air conditioning on (2 windows open) .  Then picture the combine coming up on the passenger side of the pickup.  Yep, I now have lungs full of wheat dust because I couldn’t reach the window crank.  Not that I’m complaining.  I LOVE FARMING!  :-)

This is Baxter’s 1st year as a farmer and he totally loves it – even more than I do.  My farmer guy can hardly take a step without the little darling right there.  But when it’s time to get in the truck, this is what you see:

So, what do you do when you’re too short to get in the truck by yourself?

HELP!!!!

(I get by with a little help from my friends!!!!!!!)

And then there’s the bliss of being in the truck:

And this is WHY we’re in the truck:

I wish I’d taken a good picture of the huge cloud of dust behind the combine but I guess you’ll have to take my word for that.

That’s enough of the farm report for today.  Stay tuned tho – soybeans are next and then sugarbeets.  I bet you can hardly stand to wait.  Not.

I found a fun place to shop the other day that is just full of interesting things – mostly old things – like myself – I mean, like my mother.  (Whew, almost let that cat out of the bag!).  A few things hopped in my car for a ride to my home:

I love, love, love that window.  I have a couple plans for it which will be so awesome – IF I get ‘er done!  You know what I’m saying sister?  The step ladder is in front of my house with flowers  and the bench immediately went in front of my woodshed.  It’s a very plain bench and of course it looked very lonesome.  It needed some friends to sit with.  Hmmmm.  Fall is coming.  Why, I asked myself, don’t I build some pumpkins since I didn’t grow any.  Here’s how it looked:

  

 

These pumpkins measure 9 X 17 and are 2 1/2” deep.  I will make these for any orders I get for $25.00.  Shipping would be extra but I gotta warn you that they weigh about 3 lbs. so shipping from Minnesota could be – well, more than a postage stamp.  If you hear what I’m sayin’?  If you live in my neighborhood you would of course save shipping.  Just leave a comment on my blog if you are interested. 

I also made these other pumpkins last year using 2” lumber and added gouges around the edges.  They are plain pumpkins but Mrs. Farmhouse showed them with a punch needle project attached.  Like this:

These pumpkins are 7” X 14” and 1 1/2” thick and sell for $12.00.  (Does not include the punch needle.)

Just thought I’d try this to see if there’s any interest. 

Have a great week!

Ms. Faye